Writing the Final Word

Bob Hagerty, ’78, teaches others how to preserve their life stories.

James R. (Bob) Hagerty, ’78, has spent decades chronicling the lives of others, but it’s his work in obituary writing that has become his calling. A veteran journalist with a long career at the Wall Street Journal and now a freelance contributor to the WSJ, the New York Times and other publications, Hagerty has carved out a niche telling the stories of lives well lived — and sometimes overlooked — with clarity, depth, and heart.

When he began specializing in obituary writing about a decade ago, it struck him how little adult children often knew about their parents’ lives. “A lot of good stories just kind of get lost,” he said. “Although children and friends have been told about these things, they only sort of remember it. And a story that you only half remember is usually not very good.”

That realization led Hagerty to advocate for a simple yet powerful idea: write your own story. His book, “Yours Truly: An Obituary Writer’s Guide to Telling Your Story,” encourages people to take control of their narrative — not just for posterity’s sake, but as a way to reflect on one’s life journey. “If you can’t think of anything positive that might be said about you in your obituary, it’s not too late to try to improve the narrative.”

Hagerty offers practical advice for those intimidated by the task. Start with the basics — dates, places, names — and then go deeper. “Ask yourself: What was I trying to do with my life, and why? How did that turn out?” He emphasizes honesty over perfection. 

“Your obituary isn’t a nomination for sainthood,” he joked. “It should include the good and the bad and do it in a way that doesn’t put blame on others.”

His own story began in Grand Forks, where both of his parents were journalists at the Grand Forks Herald. Hagerty knew from his time working on his high school paper that would be his path too, but rather than studying journalism at UND, he earned a degree in economics. He did, however, immerse himself in journalism by working on the student newspaper staff. Eventually becoming editor of the Dakota Student, he honed his craft and developed the work ethic that would carry him through a global career. “It’s unbelievable how much freedom we had to do what we wanted,” he said. “It was a great opportunity.”

From UND, Hagerty’s journey took him to the Wall Street Journal, where an internship led to a full-time job, and eventually to international assignments in Hong Kong and Europe. 

Hagerty continues to write obituaries and champion the idea that everyone has a story worth telling. “You really ought to write something down,” he said. “Because your family is probably going to make a mess of it, despite their good intentions.”

Tips for Writing Your Own Life Story

Advice from obituary writer and UND alum James Hagerty

Start Early

Don’t wait until your health deteriorates. Memories fade, and the best stories are often clearest when told sooner rather than later.

Think Beyond the Résumé

Your story isn’t just a list of jobs and dates. Ask yourself: “What was I trying to do with my life, and why? How did that turn out?”

Be Honest, Not Perfect

You’re not writing a nomination for sainthood. Include both successes and setbacks told with humility and without blame.

Provide Context

Future generations may not recognize names or places. Add details that make your story understandable and meaningful to others.

Record and Transcribe

If writing feels daunting, start by recording yourself or having someone interview you. Then transcribe and edit the conversation into a readable format.

Organize and Preserve

Whether it’s a simple document or a printed book, make sure your story is saved in a format that’s easy to share with family and friends.